The B&S Sweeps Western Poweshiek County College Satire Newspaper Association Awards

In a stunning victory over its peers, The B&S won all eleven of the awards it was nominated for in the first annual Western Poweshiek County College Satire Newspaper Association Awards Ceremony, which were sponsored by The B&S. Said B&S co-editor Nick Lloyd, "I'm so thrilled about this. I'm especially proud of our Powechuckle for Best Makeup Effects." (The awards are affectionately called "Powechuckles."

The ceremony, which was held last Sunday at Harris, was hosted by Billy Crystal, who sang, danced, and joked for over three hours in what one critic called, "his best performance since Analyze That." Even Joan Rivers spoke highly of the event, praising The B&S as having "a classic look. Black and white are very 'in' colors this season."

Student Louis Thompson, who watched the awards ceremony, said, "I was on the edge of my seat. I invited all my friends over for a Western Poweshiek County College Satire Newspaper Association Awards party, and it was great. But none of us predicted that The B&S would win all the awards! I personally thought that Susan Lucci was overdue for a win, but it's hard to begrudge The B&S any of their awards, especially when you look at their competition."

"You know, we decided to found the Western Poweshiek County College Satire Newspaper Association to showcase all of the great work that goes on here in Western Poweshiek County," said B&S co-editor Aron Szapiro. "We had no idea that it would prove to be so rewarding for us. It's so flattering to be recognized in this way by our peers. This doesn't mean we're going to slack off, though. Next year we hope to improve on this record." When it was pointed out to Szapiro that there are only eleven different award categories, he replied, "Really? Shit, we'll have to think of some new ones."

The awards, which are roughly equivalent to 2.3 Grammys, or 1/345 of an Oscar, will be proudly displayed in the bottom drawer of a filing cabinet in the back room of the Publications Building.

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